Hello, From the Other Side is the sort of non-advice, advice column I wanted when I was in early grief and wasn't sure if I'd ever make it to the other side (other side of what, I'm not sure).
About Hello, From the Other Side
When my husband Brad died of a rare and aggressive cancer in 2017 - after coming out of the fog just enough to realize how truly awful grief was - one of the first things I wrote in my journal was, "I just wish I could skip ahead."
At the time, I thought grief was something you dealt with - for a year, tops - and then it would be better. And all I wanted to do was to get to the other side. The side where the horrors of cancer and widowhood were behind me.
Of course, since that day, I've learned there is no "other side."
There's life. There's death. And there's grief in between.
But there is another side to those early days (months? years?). A side where the grief will get softer. It will become more manageable. You will get stronger (cliche, I know).
Most days, I live on the other side.
There’s no guidebook for the grieving. Most of us are out there, on our own little planet, lost & fumbling from one day to the next, wishing we could skip ahead to when this grief thing is over.
The bad news? You can’t. It’s kind of a forever thing and the only way out is through.
The good news? You can ask me.
Think of me as your older grief sister. The one who’s been through the shit and lived to tell the tale (so far). A cancer survivor (2011), a widow (2017), and a caregiver to my dying dad (2018), I’ve been through it and with plenty of stories to tell.
I don’t have expertise, but I have experience. Lots and lots of experience.
Each month, I’ll answer a question from the community and give my honest and real feedback.
If you want to feel less alone in your grief and learn from my experiences (and mistakes), welcome - and hello, from the other side (of complete and utter devastation.)
Have a question for a future column? Ask it here. (while I ask for your name, in no way does it need to be your real name. In fact, I'm a huge fan of creative, made-up names. Let's think back to the old advice column days: signed, "lost and lonely in Louisville" or "wallowing widow from Wisconsin")