Joy Still Exists List #1
Because sometimes we need a little reminder
Welcome to the first edition of the Joy Still Exists List! In this space, I share things that I find fascinating, intriguing, insightful, weird, and yes, even joyful. Please consider sharing or subscribing with others who may find this useful, helpful, or entertaining.
I know I’m not alone when I say this, but the world is extra heavy and extra griefy right now. In moments of global catastrophe, it can be hard to embrace joy as it often comes with feelings of guilt and privilege.
But the Forced Joy Project didn’t start because life was going well. It started when we were heavy in shit. It started in a moment of desperation - to serve as a reminder that when you’re living in the darkness, to look for the light.
So yes, the world is falling apart and many of us are feeling helpless and hopeless. But even so, remember: joy still exists.
I’m writing this first edition of the Joy Still Exists List from the wee hours of the morning during the middle of some strange, fall thunderstorm. The only light is from the glow of my computer, a tiny candle, and the occasional flash of lightning, which feels appropriate because the unofficial theme of today is about embracing the season we’re in (and for me in the Northern Hemisphere, that’s a very moody fall).
This is on my mind partly because the world is feeling very dark these days and also because the reflections from my most recent retreat involve honoring the shadowy parts of ourselves during life’s transitions. During our time together, we focused on what it means to slow down, rest, and let go.
It’s not always easy to connect with the darker/quieter/moodier seasons of life, but holy hell is it necessary. And today’s joys are little reminders of this fact.
Biggest Joy of the Week:
Taking Dune, Maggie, and Nate (two pups and a human) on a fall color/beach/brewery tour over the weekend. I’m lucky to be surrounded by turquoise lakes and trees in vibrant shades of golds and reds, but it really is the little things that bring an extra dose of joy: a couple dogs, the crunch of leaves underfoot, a shoreline, the sky.
What I’m Reading:
Instead of resisting this season, learn to embrace the winter light
A powerful piece on not attaching action to outcome (and how to keep going in the dark)
This is your permission to go outside (in case you’re looking for it)
Thank you NYT for allowing me to remove “raking” from my list of tasks this fall
Can’t Stop Thinking About:
This sauna. Part of our daily routine for the retreat included a pre-sunrise sauna and lake dip. I sat in the dark, sometimes under the pitter-patter of raindrops on the roof, and breathed. And sweated. And hollered as I dove face-first into the frigid lake. And it was glorious. My desire for a sauna is bigger than ever as I can now concretely taste this future ritual.
Wind Phones. One of our members (hi, Lora!) of the Forced Joy Club shared this article about wind phones and how they are becoming more common in North America (after originating in Japan). A wind phone is an unconnected telephone where callers can hold one-way conversations with deceased loved ones - giving our grief a place to go. Would you use one?
Dump Ranch. Yes, dump ranch. I don’t even like ranch, but this healthier version of the classic dressing was a staple during last week’s retreat and I can’t stop thinking about it. Try it and let me know your thoughts.
How about you? Where are you finding joy right now? Let us know in the comments below.
Wind phones sound amazing! I would absolutely love a space (besides my bedroom) to vocalize my thoughts to Dan, whether he can actually hear them or not. As for finding joy, I have been making my watercolor practice a more frequent activity and it’s bringing me a lot of happiness in a time where the memories of Dan’s decline start seeping in. I am going to check out all of your linksthank you!! Absolutely love your first list on here. ♥️
Oh my gosh Dana! The article about holding on the hope/outcomes really resonates with me after being so worried that a weekend with family would be triggering and instead was full of love, laughter, and tears.
Absolutely YES would I use a wind phone if I found one! The things I say in my head would pour out of me to Oscar, all the things he's missed, my love for him, how much I miss him and us. Someone should find out where they all are and have a list we can reference!
Thank you for sharing the links to what you are reading. XO