Joy Still Exists List #3
Because sometimes we need a little reminder
Welcome to the Joy Still Exists List! In this space, I share things that I find inspiring, illuminating, and yes, joyful. Please consider supporting my work by subscribing or sharing with others who may find this list helpful.
It may seem trivial to talk about joy when the world is extra griefy right now. But the Forced Joy Project didn’t start because life was going well. It started when we were heavy in shit. It started in a moment of desperation - to serve as a reminder that when you’re living in the darkness, to look for the light. Now, more than ever, we need a place for joy.
So while the world is falling apart and you may be feeling hopeless, let’s remember: joy still exists.
We are days after a new year and I’m mentally exhausted. I’m straddling the line between gripping tightly for my desire to start the year with ease, simplicity, and rest and spiraling through the many, many posts about goal setting, habit tracking, and all the things I should be doing now to set myself up for a successful year.
I like ritual. I like planning. I like feeling like an organizational queen. But I also like the feeling of peace. And my brain is ping-ponging between those - sometimes opposing - truths.
So today’s list is a little manic. Part hibernation/part resolution (or at least, a dance dance resolution).
What’s Joyful:
After a month full of holiday joys (and also holiday stress), I wanted to transition into a new year manifesting what I wanted more of in the future. For me, that’s: Nature. Saunas. Writing. Cold Dips. Warm Fires. Games. Hiking. Reading. Connecting.
My partner, Nate, and I escaped to a little place outside the Shenandoah Mountains and did just that.
I hate new year resolutions, but I love a good opportunity to reflect. And last week, as I was thinking about what I wanted more of in the coming year, dance was at the top of the list. Not good dancing or choreographed dancing, but wild and weird dancing. Daily dancing. In the kitchen. On the bed. Walking down the street. Once a day, for one song. And 4 days in, I can attest that I have smiled and felt joy every day for 3 minutes. So yes, why don’t we dance more?
And it is divine.
Maggie Rogers & Pharell (Apparently music is my joy for this month)
I've been a fan of Maggie Rogers since her NPR Tiny Desk Concert, but before that, was this priceless video of Pharell, listening to her at NYU for the first time. She’s magic. His reaction is magic. It’s all magic. (Thank you to
for dusting off this video for ).Joy Work Writing Workshop with
Author of How We Heal is hosting a “transformative writing workshop designed to help you connect with and cultivate joy in 2024. During our time together, you will embark on a journey of self-discovery and empowerment as we explore the realms of past, present, and future joy while nurturing your healing process.” If you’re looking for why this workshop is so needed, read her post below:
The words “joy” and “workout” don't usually go together in my book, but this one kept me smiling throughout (and takes less than 10 minutes!).
What’s Inspiring:
Swimming Through: Documentary Short
A beautiful short documentary about three women who bond over their love of cold water swimming.
I’ve been slowly savoring and re-reading
‘s book Wintering as my sort of guidepost for the next several months. So it’s no wonder I’m feeling deeply connected to articles like this one, which is a beautiful reminder that even in the darkness, to always look for the light.
Speaking of Katherine May, here is a beautiful podcast episode between her and
on slowing down and reconnecting. A must-listen for everyone.I love a fresh start - a new journal, an empty planner - boundless possibilities. The problem is, I tend to overcomplicate and overcommit (I never end up writing 1000 words a day. Which is why I love this piece by
for on the simple act of writing your “three best things” of the day. We do something similar in the Forced Joy Club (our private grief community) - where we challenge ourselves to find one thing that brought us joy (and when you’re deep in grief, sometimes you have to really search for it). But after 30 days of documenting, to be able to look back and see all the tiny little joys in your life, even among all the grief, is incredibly moving.
What’s Illuminating:
Are You Confusing Stress for Anxiety?
I consider myself a highly anxious human (with a remarkable ability to fake it as a highly chill human). My mind tends to go deep down the rabbit hole of doom and gloom, even in the best of times. I also consider myself I highly stressful human (with a remarkable ability to fake it as a highly relaxed human). Working, adulting, balancing, breathing - some days it all feels too much. What I never considered with the fact that I might be confusing the two. This article gave me a lot to think about (and then be stressed - or is it anxious? - about).
I was honored to be a podcast guest on 14 Foot Falls, where we talked about grief, joy, and transformation. The conversation was a beautiful reflection of my life with Brad and the life I’ve created since his death. It also felt unique as we went to some new places, including some that were challenging, but worthwhile to talk about.
7 Therapists Share Their Best Advice for Coping With Existential Dread and Grief
Who among us doesn’t need advice for coping with existential dread and grief?
It’s Okay to Suck When You Try Something New
I hate being bad at things (watercoloring, I’m looking at you). And I’m guessing I’m not alone. But this past year, I’ve been embracing trying new things despite not being good (because hello, we’re supposed to be bad at new things). This article is the reminder I needed that we can still have fun with things we suck at (right??? right.).
How about you? Where are you finding joy right now? Let’s continue the conversation in the comments below.
Also big Maggie Rogers fan - thanks for sharing that video